Friday, September 8, 2017

Irma's Eye

In case you woke up from a 20 year coma today, and your first thought was to read blogs, there is a pretty large lady coming to visit the United States, after she wore out her welcome in some lovely islands. 
 
Franklin lost everything in Hurricane Andrew.  Everything.  His brother graciously offered to come down to Florida with a U Haul to help him.  Franklin laughed "bring a trash bag or two.  There is nothing left."  His washer and dryer were in the pool in the back yard.
 
 
As he left Florida, he saw his car blocks away.
 
My husband and Jim Cantore have been having a "bromance" since Tuesday.  Seriously, that Hurricane sounder is about to send me over the edge.
 
Years ago, Franklin and I had to caravan my sister-in-law's new Dodge Mini-Van to Maryland.  I had the two smaller kids because the new mini van had a DVD player.  They chose ICE AGE.  They fell asleep and the movie ended and so the ICE AGE loop played for 2 hours because I didn't want to stop the car and chance waking up a one and two year old on I-95, I didn't know how to work the damn thing and I could not get my right arm back there.  I am a multi-tasker but not a contortionist.
 
Anyway, Franklin paces and paces in between cigarettes and he runs in to get the latest co ordinates.  I cannot take the music.
 
He ticks a bit when he watches the devastation. 
 
I tick when I hear that music from ICE AGE.
 
I get it. 
 
And then today, I saw it, read it, watched it, processed it, shook my head and went back.  Again, I saw it, read it, watched it and processed it again.
 
I don't care who said it, why they said it or what they hoped to gain from it, but let me just point something out to you, Karma is a bit like IRMA.  It's a Bitch.
 
If you are cheering that Trump's "Winter White House" is going to be destroyed or cheering because his home in St. Martin was destroyed or even think this is payback for electing him...let me tell you about a Hurricane.
 
I am a good old fashioned Pennsylvania Girl.  Give me a blizzard.  Bring'em on.  No humidity or mosquitoes.  Everything is white and clean and pretty.  Cardinals look amazing.  You wait for the power to come on, put chili on the stove and go outside and plow.  It is awesome.  Nothing like a snow day. 
 
I am pretty sure if you are one of the "cheering" folks, you have never been through a Hurricane.  Let me tell you a little bit about what you don't know about or see on the news.
 
1.  Just because there is this huge, swirling red dot out in an ocean, with Jim Cantore telling you it is headed your way, you don't just get to sit there and wait.  You have to go to work.  It is days away.  Your kids go to school and after school activities.
 
2.  During your work time, you sneak out, buy water, hotdogs, propane tanks, wipes, zip lock bags, fill prescriptions, make copies of important documents, buy a portable phone charger and scan important documents to somebody you might know who lives in Omaha in case you do lose everything.  Your Omaha friend becomes your voice.
 
3.  You get home and rearrange or clean out your garage and continue to act like all is normal around the kids.  In my house, when you start rearranging the garage, they know what is coming.  You get the generator out, make sure it starts.  You get your boards out, the nails the hammer and the spray paint.  (you spray paint the names of all the storms you go through)
 
4.  Next day, wait in line for gas, get gas in the cars and gas for the generator,  drain your checking account, even if there is only nine dollars in there, you take it.  Irma will most likely steal all the power and cause computer crashes and you will need money.  You bring everything from the outside into the garage and arrange it strategically.  You put up the boards.  You take several pictures of your home boarded up.  Not for social media, but to prove your due diligence if needed for the insurance company.  Then, you go inside your home and video tape and photograph all of your contents.  You open drawers, closets, and film everything you have.
 
5.  During all of this time, you listen for the Hurricane music, go get the laundry that needs to be folded, get back in front of the TV in time and fold and watch the red swirling dot.  And all this time, you just keep thinking, "should I stay or should I go?"  Remember The Clash?  I think they wrote this before a Hurricane. If I go it will be trouble, If I stay it will be double.
 
We have stayed.  We have stayed with newborns.  We have stayed with a house full of people.  A Hurricane is loud.  Not like a train.  Loud.  Then it is quiet when the eye goes by and then loud again.  And you cannot see outside, the house is boarded.  You lose power and you have no idea what time it is.   When you finally go outside, the humidity is so unreal and the mosquitoes can pick you up and carry you.  Snakes have washed up from the water, alligators too.  All you can hear are chainsaws, generators and power washers.  Yes, you need to pressure wash your house.
 
Then, you take down all the boards, let them try, stack them back in the garage, take everything back outside, move the cars and eat bun length hotdogs.  For every meal.
 
What I described is what happens if you stay and escape your Hurricane Visitor. 
 
But Irma is different.  She is like Ursula the Sea Witch.  She is big and strong.  She has already ruined islands, islands.  Do you know how big and strong you have to be to ruin an inland?
 
My mom is now a Florida resident.  She lives in a 55 plus mobile home park.  She was forced to evacuate.  She is a mess.  She is high strung on a normal day.  She had no idea she had to get a hotel room on a middle floor or why.  She was mostly worried about a 93 year old couple from her park.  They don't watch television, they cannot hear or see and they don't use the internet for 93 year old reasons.  Can you imagine how scared this couple might be?
 
 Those who stay, will get to sit there and listen to the  roof being blown off or windows being smashed while the neighbor's mailbox is blown off and crashes into the one window you couldn't reach to board. 
 
There are women that will birth babies in this storm, in their homes and without modern medicine or C-sections. Any ladies out there want to do this and tell me what it is like? 
 
There will be moms alone with their children, scared to death, because their husband's are deployed, fighting for your free speech and there will be first responders who will put strangers ahead of their own family's.
 
Cars will be picked up, fly and land.  Boats will be stacked up like a game of Jenga.  Cranes in will most likely fall and crash into other buildings. 
 
Roofs will fly off homes and buildings as easy as opening up a yogurt container.  Rain will dump in and ruin everything.  When that roof flies off, it flies into something.  Another house, car, boat, tree, whatever it finds. 
 
Waters, raging waters, will start to run through your family room where you were supposed to be opening Christmas presents in December.
 
Blind people will stumble through the wreckage, folks in wheelchairs will grab onto railings and hope they don't give way. Their  catheter bags will fill up and the importance will not be to empty the bags and the urine will go back into the person.   People with cancer who are weak from treatments and sick will have to "suck it up" to get through it.
 
Elderly will fret or say they "have lived long enough." 
 

Trees will fall on homes and go through roofs and into bedrooms and kill people.  Once the tree is there, the home will begin to flood.
 
Bodies will be washed up from graves and bones scattered on the ground.
 
Even the shyest person will be forced to sleep and live in a shelter with 500 others.  On a cot.  No air conditioning with limited food.  And fear of what your new life could be like.
 
Jobs will be lost, four generation businesses lost, marriages ended, people will die, others will be injured, quilts made by your grandmother for your first born, ruined and cars totaled. Bridges will collapse.   Lives will be changed.  In one split second. 

 All at the hands of Mother Nature's lousy friend, Irma.
 
My friend bought their dream in St. Thomas a year ago.  They bought a condo, became best friends again, started the empty- nester life and "the dream is lost."
 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Enough people. Enough. Don't wish this on anyone. Don't cheer when anyone's home is destroyed. Don't wish flooding, death or injury on anyone.  IRMA didn't vote.  She doesn't care who is president.  She has no feelings.  IRMA will be gone by Tuesday and never have the chance to look and celebrate all the chaos, death, injury, disease, and horror she has caused. 
Remember how everyone went out and put a flag up AFTER 9/11? (which was amazing to me because you should be flying one everyday). Remember how kind and loving everyone was?
Where did that sentiment go? 
 
Yes, I saw folks come together when Harvey hung out in Texas for a few days.  Wonderful.  Humanity.  I saw the faces of humanity. 
 
There will always be looting and always be price hikes because sometimes Mother Nature has PMS and brings out the worst in folks.  IRMA is a female so I am guessing it will happen again.
 
Millions of people are scared tonight and will remain scared for days.  They will hear Irma coming, taking big giant steps and then she will raise her hands for more hell and chaos. 
 
This isn't about an election people.  Never should you hope that something catastrophic happens to anyone, any human being, ever.  Period. 
 
Don't put your hands in the air and cheer for destruction or clap over heartache just because you didn't vote for somebody or don't agree with that person.
 
Instead, after Irma raises her hands, makes the mess and leaves, grab a hand, lend a hand, bandage a hand, squeeze the hand of a friend and say, "glad you made it."
 
Prayers for the people of the  Sunshine State.  All 21 million of you. 
 
 
 
 
 



 

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