Tupper Ware, Two Buck Chuck, The Grinch, Two Peppermints and Teeth cleaner.

Nobody I know is in the Christmas Spirit.  Nobody.

Franklin has either been blessed or cursed with four sisters.  One of his sisters is "J" and she is referred to as "Aunt Bee."   
We have given her this title with the utmost respect. 

"J" is the kind of person that you want your son to marry, your daughter to become or the sister you want to have.  "J" spends her summer canning, making homemade jelly and spending time with the grand kids.  She is known to pull the car over for a great yard sale.  She is the most appreciative person I have ever known.  She spends time on ancestry.com, has dug up (not literally) relatives of all kinds and is eager to share her findings.

She doesn't forget birthdays and is known to give siblings, nephews, nieces and grand kids photo books of pictures of all ancestors.

She is an "old school" old fashioned woman with a fabulous circle of friends.

She has lived in her house for "years".  She has raised her family of three boys there.  A fabulous mother.  The "go to" girl.

When Franklin's other sister, "P" moved in after she became a member of the "club", "P" encouraged her to get rid of her dining room table.  It had seen a good thirty years.

"J" would not part with that table.  Every nick, scape, dent and carving came from one of her boys will they were growing up.

"J" takes care of everything she owns.  "P" told me the other day "the b----- won't even part with a piece of Tupperware that she has had for 20 years."  She cherishes her stuff.  To some, it is "stuff", to her it is priceless.

I love "P".

I love "J".

Last week, "J's" house and all of her Tupperware burnt to the ground.  To the ground.

Even the dining room table.

Later that day, I spoke to "P" who was devastated for her sister.  And just sad. 

And after speaking to her sister, "J" was devastated for her sister.  Both lost belongings of the their children. 

And "P" felt badly that she ever said anything about the table.   Or the Tupperware. 

I have thought about my sister-in-laws for the last week.  A tragedy made them roommates.  Another will give them companionship.

My neighbor who also had her house burn down, also right before Christmas, had a meltdown in my living room one day after her fire.  Her friend, who had breast cancer had given her some antique buttons.  They were lost in the fire. 
She was telling me how upset she was about the buttons when her husband said, "for goodness sakes, they are buttons!"

To which she responded, "but they were MY buttons.  I am 50 some years old and I think that I am entitled and have earned some damn buttons."

I sooo get that.  And Tupperware. 

My sister-in-law "P" just buried her son in June.  This will be "the" first Christmas.  "J" was holding "P" up.  And now this. It was going to be a tough day even with a roof over their head.    They will both hold one another up.  That is a foundation that cannot be destroyed.

Yesterday, I had a conversation with my friend, "S".  I am pretty sure that we were separated at birth.  She is the fancy, "girly" one and I am the tomboy.

She lost her mother very suddenly a few weeks ago.  And to her mom's credit, her mom Christmas shopped early.   The shopping early was good but she passed on before she could wrap the gifts.  I don't even need to write more.  I cannot even imagine what that was like, to find the gifts and then to wrap them and then pass them out on Christmas Day.

She told me that later that day,after wrapping the gifts, her husband said that his parents had called and wanted to know what they were having for Christmas dinner. 

"I looked at him and said, I am having a case of two buck chuck from Trader Joe's.  You can have whatever." 

And then my sister who was separated from me at birth said, "when he asked me what I wanted for Christmas, I just said December 26."

Today, Franklin was there, dressed in green.  I think he wanted to strap fake antlers to our dog Willie and drive to Who ville.  He was sad, sad for his sisters, life, stuff, just so not in the spirit. 

Okay, I pulled out my red and green pom poms, put on a Santa outfit and went off, " we have our health, our house, great kids, even though we don't even know where one is,  and we have Tupperware.  Your sisters are alone, no Tupperware, house burnt to the ground, come one."  Right in front of the Dollar Tree.  I just had a Christmas cheering session.  "Come on husband, I need you help, don't fail me now."

I went in to the Dollar Tree for gift bags and tissue paper and got behind a couple of the most elderly people ever.  She was a tiny, frail woman, bundled up in a Christmas sweater, black nylon pants, tiny little black flats with bells on them,  perfectly hair sprayed 1950's hair and she shuffled...really shuffled.  Her husband was tall, lean and so pale.  He had glasses with a baseball cap, a vest and his pants were undone at the top with a long sleeved, button down shirt that was thread bare.  He shuffled more than she did. He was like a tall, elderly Forest Gump.  They shuffled like Ruth Buzzy and some guy I don't remember his name from Laugh In. He had the longest fingers ever.  She followed a young girl around the store.  The young girl referred to them as "great gran and great dad."

The ladies stood in the card isle where I know "great gran" was picking out cars to write for all the grand and great grand kids with the five dollar bills.  "Great gran" read and picked for several minutes and made sure the great grand daughter counted out the cards.

I was envious watching them.  I so wish I could spend just one more day "ripping" (that is what we called shopping) with my Great grandma, Emma and my mamaw.  I wasn't stalking them, I was watching them with fondness.  I really hope that young girl could appreciate this moment.  When it is gone, you will want it back.  It was lunchtime and I knew she would be taking her great grandparents out for lunch.  I was guessing Cracker Barrel.

They wondered over to the candy canes.  I can so picture "great gran" taping a candy cane to each card.  She said, "too many choices, where are the red and white ones that are peppermint?"  I had to laugh.  Great gran said "I used to love eating candy canes but now they stick to my dentures.  I can only eat the soft ones, the short kinds.  Love them though."

I knew immediately which ones she was talking about, my personal favorites.

So they picked out the perfect amount of candy canes to go with the cards.

In the mean time, "great dad" was towering over the teeth cleaner.  He shuffled.  Really shuffled.  I was shocked how he shuffled.  I was also stunned at how tall he was.  Even with "old age shrinkage", this guy was tall. 

Finally, he approaches the cash register.  I go in behind me.  "Great gran" is standing near the window gazing outside after paying for her purchases.

He put on the conveyor belt, two boxes of teeth cleaner and two little bags of the soft peppermints. 

He pays.  It took him 12 minutes to open up his perfect wallet, get the money out, hand it over, collect the change and put it back in the wallet and shuffle on over to the window.

As he gets to her, my transaction is completed and I am whizzing by as he hands her the two bags of peppermints and says "Merry Christmas."

She grinned from ear to ear. "Same thing he gets me every year."

He shuffles by and says "seventy two years or 144 bags of peppermints and still going strong."

I smiled at all of them.  I wanted to be that great grand daughter for one afternoon.

I wondered how many tragedies they endured, how many times she stood somewhere encouraging her husband to get in the spirit and how many loved ones they buried.  I wondered if their house ever burned down or what their story really was.  I sat in my car and watched them shuffle to the car, get in, buckle up and depart. 
A 15 minute process.

 It really wasn't about the gifts or the "stuff" or the Tupperware, it was about giving love and being loved in return.  And being there, doing what you need to do for the ones you love. 

Christmas.