charelston

After years of going where the jobs were, I decided to control my destiny and move where I wanted.  It took me one visit to know that I needed to move to Charleston.

Franklin and I had been dating about six months and for his birthday, we went shopping for a place to live.

We were not married and the goal was for me to get established and for him to follow.  Oh, the passion.  It didn't take long for us to decide for him just to move in and let's get the show on the road.

We loved Charleston.  Loved it.  We lived a block from the beach and soaked in every moment of history and southern charm.

Our plan was to elope on New Year's Eve, in the Gazebo in the Battery.  We had actually taken pictures for a couple doing the same thing one afternoon and it was "us."

On December 16, plans changed.  We were awarded custody of another southern charmer, the "button."

You know what they say, a child changes everything.  It did.  And we loved it.

Finally, our mothers told us to get married.  And we did.  Fourth of July.  Nothing says love like giving up your independence on Independence Day.

We were a family.  All three of us.  Our son attended pre-school, learning to  swim, speak Spanish and "fit into a normal family."

Late last night, we came back from a weekend in Charleston.  Franklin, Walker, Addie and I soaked in the southern charm once again.

It was a "different trip."  Walker and Franklin spent most of it on the U.S.S. Yorktown.  Addie and I were tourists, hotel room, sweatshirts and all.

But, there wasn't a turn that I took that I didn't think of my son.Of course we took the kids to see our old house and I swear I could see the "button" on the back porch celebrating his fifth birthday.  My favorite garden spot was still there.  I can remember him picking out red Gerber daisies there like it was yesterday.  Where had the time gone?  I would have said that regardless of his present state.  I looked at his old pre school, and all I could think of was his Elmo backpack.  I remember him looking at pelicans on the beach and calling them pterodactyls.  Yesterday at the aquarium, there were pelicans braving the cold and I just wished I could see my son. 

Yesterday, as we left with our favorite place in the rear view mirror, I wondered how different our lives might have been if we never moved.  Really, what would have happened? We were a new family and so happy and I would do anything to capture that magic again.  The magic of Charleston.    As the two in the back seat started to fight, I left that daydream and stared ahead.  Straight ahead.

Today he called.  We don't get to speak to him very often.  I needed to speak to him today.  With the news of another young life taken because of a drug overdose, and a trip down memory lane, I just needed to hear his voice. 

And I did.  What I remember most of the conversation, "Mom, I just want to make you proud."

And, I have no idea how that is going to happen.  What I do know is it doesn't get there by looking behind or in any rear view mirror.  You only find your new path walking forward.  And it doesn't matter where you are, it matters who you are.

And then I thought about my friend, who lost a son, whose favorite quote is "don't be sorry it is over, just be happy it happened." 

The beginning, in Charleston, was awesome.  I am praying that the middle is just as awesome too.